December 28, 2008

On December 25th, we spent a nice Christmas day together. It was so good to be able to make an already special day even more special by spending it with the whole family. Below are a couple pictures I took of Grandpa, Grandma, and the Grandkids.

Brad (Jocelyn's Son)

In the early morning hours on Boxing Day (December 26) Jocelyn had a seizure at home and was brought to Welland Hospital, where she is now an inpatient. She had one more seizure after getting to the hospital but no more since then. At this time the doctors and nurses are trying to get her bone pain better controlled. Although weak and tired, Jocelyn is alert. She has a great sense of peace and is confident of the love of God, family and friends. Christmas is the time of celebrating Emmanuel, God with us. Truly God is with Jocelyn, John and the boys even during this time.

Kathy (Jocelyn's sister-in-law)

Thankfulness
Our family can't even express or keep up with thanking everyone for their acts of kindness, thoughtfulness, and prayers. So please know they are appreciated at this difficult time. Prayers are the most important need for our family. A special thanks to my cousin Cyn; you have a wonderful gift of encouragement and faith. Jocelyn

2 Corinthians 1:3, 4

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.

2 Corinthians 9:14
And in their prayers for you their hearts will go out to you, because of the surpassing grace God has given you. Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!

December 12, 2008

It’s Friday evening and Joanne has just dropped off a meal for us. Jocelyn, Brad, Darryl and myself dig in and in 10 minutes it’s gone. It probably took hours to prepare but we polish it off in no time. Jocelyn came home Wednesday to “stay” home. After everything that happened last week we are exhausted and so glad to be home. Four of Jocelyn’s girl friends and coworkers Andrea, Mary, Coby and Jane got into our house and completely decorated it for Christmas. Apparently Rob Bouwers organized the whole thing. A guy? It has a beautiful Christmas tree completely decorated and each of the office employees picture is inside an ornament. The house is full of beautiful poinsettia’s and Jocelyn’s Christmas village was all set up with lights. When I would come home from being with Jocelyn all day at the hospital I would enter into a lonely dark house. It was nice to sit in the living room with all the decorations. I hated coming home without Jocelyn. Last Saturday after getting more bad news Jocelyn said that was enough, “No more treatments;” and as soon as she had recovered enough from surgery she came home. I couldn’t wait to show her the living room.

One of my buddies John and his son Jeff wired our living room with surround sound so she can listen to worship and praise songs, which she loves to listen to. We have set up an electric hospital bed in the living room to make her comfortable. When Jocelyn came home Wednesday my biker buddy and prayer warrior Pete Wierenga and Mary Bokma were there to help Jocelyn to get into the house. Jocelyn is resting comfortably and when she is resting in bed, she has no pain. She has a kitchen shelf full of medicine that I have to give her every so many hours. I am with her 24/7 to look after all her personal needs. Why? Because of she is my best friend, lover and my wife. I know without a doubt, she would do the same if it was me. I sleep on the couch in the living room at night so that I can help her at a moments notice. I keep in regular contact with my sister-in-law Kathy who is a cancer doctor to make sure we understand it all. She is amazing. Our youngest son Brad has quit his job and is staying with us. That is a big deal and together Brad and I can handle this. Our “middle” son Darryl can also get some time off from work and so with the three of us we will be in even better shape. We have set up the house so that visitors enter through the downstairs and can tiptoe into the living room without too much fuss. Last night our oldest son Chris and his wife Tiffany were over with their kids and it was neat to be able to have the grandkids play downstairs when they got to rowdy. Jocelyn needs a lot of rest so visits have to be very short and quiet.

When the hospital support staff and the community support organizations ask if we need any counseling we politely decline the offers. Why? Because we have an amazing circle of friends, a close family and a very caring and supporting church family. We are experiencing a never ending flow of love from family and friends. Jocelyn’s girl friends including Lorraine, Sonya and Vicky and others like Rob and Glenda dropped in just to give a hug and my big buddy Ed Roorda and his wife Ann stop by to drop off some home made bread, listen to a special song, hug, shed a tear and pray and have some quiet conversation. “Big Boys don’t cry, but real men do”. Pastor E.J. and Sharen stop by to visit and pray with us. Jocelyn’s brother Ron and his daughter Holly are here from Alberta. Jocelyn’s long time girl friend Winnie is here from B.C. Why do I mention all these names? Jocelyn and I are not alone in this journey. We are not afraid. We feel the comfort of our almighty God. We feel the love from our friends and family. We read scripture a lot. Jocelyn’s too favourite books are Psalms and Phillipians. We read together, share those things that stand out and pray lots. What a beautiful time it is to be able to share our deepest inmost feelings. The time we have yet together is so very very precious to us and we want to make every minute count. We can still praise our God for every minute and hour he gives us.

December 6, 2008

Update from the Family.

On Wednesday (the day after the last update), Jocelyn had gammaknife radio surgery to try to control the cancer that spread to her brain. She came through that well, although the procedure was exhausting.
She recently developed a new pain in her hip, and she went back to the Juravinski Cancer Centre in Hamilton Friday afternoon. It turned out there was a tumour in her hip which caused a partial hairline fracture. This morning, she had surgery to repair the bone and strengthen it. We hope this will allow her to walk better without pain and prevent a more serious fracture down the road.
As you imagine, this has been a very difficult week for Jocelyn, John, and the rest of the family. John and Jocelyn have been at 6 different medical centres in the space of a week. At the same time, God still can be counted on to provide strength and courage and perspective for each day. For this, and for your prayers, thoughts, and e-mails, we are grateful.
We don't know how long Jocelyn will be in the hospital; if all goes well, maybe she'll be home with-in the week. In the meantime, we ask that family and friends not come to the hospital to visit. When she is back home and on her feet we hope she will be up to visitors then. We will keep you posted in the meantime.

December 2, 2008

(An Update from the Family)

Jocelyn has had a difficult few weeks. On November 12, she had a short seizure. Although she never lost consciousness, the seizure was a warning sign that the tumor in her brain was starting to grow. Since that time, she has had further X-rays, which showed that the three small tumors in her brain have gotten a bit larger, despite her having had radiation treatments in October. We are very grateful that she was referred to Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto. There they have something called a "gamma knife" to treat brain tumors. Despite the name, there are no knives and this isn't surgery. Instead, "gamma knife" radiosurgery delivers very high-energy, focused radiation right to the tumor lesions, hopefully without affecting the rest of the brain. Jocelyn is scheduled for gamma knife radiosurgery tomorrow (Wednesday - December 3rd) and, if all goes well, she should be able to come home very soon.

John and Jocelyn also learned that the colon cancer has spread to her lungs. For now, she has no symptoms from that, and this is a very good thing. The doctors have recommended chemotherapy to shrink those tumors, but this needs to wait until the brain tumors are taken care of.

In the meantime, John and Jocelyn are in Toronto, glad to have Brad and Darryl right at their sides, helping them find their way around the city (and glad that Chris is tending things back in Fenwick).

These treatments don't come with any guarantees (though we are grateful for the possibility that there are treatments that may be able to help her). But we know that God does guarantee that he'll provide strength and grace for each day, and that nothing can separate us from his love. Pray with us, thanking God for medicine and caring nurses and doctors and friends and family. Ask God to give Jocelyn the strength, courage, and hope that she needs. And thank God for each day that we have been given.

Kathy Faber Langendoen (Sister-In-Law to John and Jocelyn)